The Bhangra-Tango Chronicles – II

Yes this is the second installment. This deals with trying to teach tango to a couple, both actors, (and friends of my parents) heretofore referred to as Xchacha and Ymasi.

This particular couple had an anniversary coming up sometime ago, a 25th anniversary… Special no? So they booked a fancy-shmancy hotel in Goa and all the friends and family were supposed to fly down for the partay. I wasn’t planning to attend (personal reasons, I have a thing about going to Goa, a kind of deal I’ve made with myself and which probably only my mom knows about.)

The Parents, however, are enthu-cutlets as we all know, and they start getting ready for the trip by going on diets and working twice as hard to finish off obligations before they have to leave. So about 2 weeks before the main event, The Mother comes up with a brilliant plan.

We’re sitting around the dining table during dinner and Ymasi calls me to ask about something when she asks whether I’m coming to Goa or not. So I give her the excuse that I had worked out and she’s like, “ Awww we’ll miss you then, too bad you have the Salsa festival at the same time”
Me: “Yeaa, I knowww, you guys have a blast, though.”

As I put the phone down, The Mother gushes forth her brilliant plan.
“Baby, why don’t you teach Xchacha and Ymasi the tango to perform on their anniversary party?

My first thought is the Tango?! Who is she kidding? First she thought she and The Father could learn it, you know, because they’re my parents, common genes and all. (Actually they aint so bad, they keep forgetting the steps and have to be reminded, is all) “Umm, I dunno, aah, errr, hmmm, uhhuhh, they might not, you know, be keen or like this idea, you know. “ I say, blabbering incoherently, trying to make it clear that I don’t think this is a good idea, at the same time making it clear that it is ‘wow whatte plan, ma, how do you come up with this kinda brilliant stuff?’

I’m trying very hard not to grimace yet convey my disapproval of this idea when she bursts forth with: “It can be your present to them. And anyway you’re not coming, na, so they’ll fee like a part of you is there.”

Shite! Now what do I do? So I think about it, for a whole 2 minutes and then decide, its not such a bad idea after all, its beginning to sound nice, infact its quite a brilliant plan, ma.. (Yea, I finally admit it, mother!!) So, I SMS Ymasi immediately. I get an enthu reply – ‘sounds lovely, will ask X and let you know’
(Which basically means I will tell X that you better do this cause I so so so so want to and will tell you when we can start)

A couple of days later, I get an SMS saying – ‘Yes lets do it. X has agreed.’ So I try to fix up a day/time to go for the first class. But they’re very very busy finishing off work and organizing the parties so they don’t meet me till about 10 days before the actual event. (Ofcourse, they’re leaving 2 days before that, so that means I have about 8 days totally to plan/work out a routine choose a song and teach them the basics of tango which took me 2 months to learn. I say no problem, we can do this, we’ll manage something, hopefully the people watching will be a little blindsided by the fact that it’s their anniversary. I’m hoping that this, coupled with their fondness for Xchacha and Ymasi , will rose-tint their eyes enough to not know if they mess up (or atleast not care if they do). Plus I don’t think anyone over there will know what proper authentic Argentine Tango is, so its good na?

I’m pretty enthu about this idea myself by now, so I manage to choose a short (2 mins 15 seconds) song, which they’ve heard before (from the movie “Scent Of A Woman”) and work out a basic idea of the steps I have to teach them. So I land up at their house the next day, after long SMS convos with Ymasi about not being able to make it at 7:00 p.m. so can she come at 7:30 p.m.? <“Suuuure, its your funeral…I mean anniversary.”>



Xchacha is watching TV when I get there and we start off the first class with a slightly embarrassing and uncomfortable conversation about tango, the trip and cricket. He’s embarrassed because he thinks he cant dance (which is true to a certain extent, he has a delightfully caveman-like gait to his steps, but the rhythm is in place), I’m embarrassed because after all, he is a famous actor, and even though he’s known me since birth, I haven’t really interacted with him individually. Much.


So, we start off and we’re just doing the basic steps facing each other so he gets an idea of the dance. (This is where I notice the caveman quality and grin silently to myself.) Soon we’re done with all the learning we can do in solo mode (i.e. individually, without holding your partner) and we need to try out the steps together. He’s a little uncomfortable at first; the tango is after all a very sensual dance and needs to have some kind of relationship between the dancers to happen. But I’m like a surrogate daughter to him so its kinda weird. Not a problem, we somehow manage to clumsily go over the steps.

After another excruciatingly long half hour of this, we stop –
1. Because he’s tired and there’s only so much one can digest at a time.
2. Because the cricket match is about to begin.

Oh but before we stop, Z (the son, who is my chaddi buddy) and a friend of his (A), turn up, waiting for the match to begin and insist that we try dancing in front of them. (argh, public humiliation) So we half-heartedly do the steps. Ofcourse they clap and say polite things.

Then the match starts and the three men are glued to the TV. I’m just about to lose my mind from boredom and Ymasi turns up. Now there’s no space to dance, since the living room is occupied by three currently dimwitted, hulking, overgrown schoolboys watching a number of men in white uniforms with long sleeves and full pants running around with a block of wood and a tiny little ball on a huge, “grass (i.e. dirt filled; did I mention the white uniforms?)” field.

So we shift to Z’s bedroom, which has enough free space as there is in my bathroom. Now when I’m alone in the bathroom showering, it doesn’t seem so small, so I can try out my steps, but add one more person and there is not much you can do by way of dancing; other stuff – hell yea [:-P], dancing – hell no.
So we try to dance and do the basic steps and somehow manage. Ofcourse Ymasi picks up faster, being that she’s a woman and that she is quite a graceful dancer. And ofcourse, the Bollywood-cum-Classical Indian dance ka jhatka is quite visible (and expected). (I’m feeling a little better now that I see her dance, thinking ‘this might just work out somewhat the way I want it to’)
Soon Xchacha comes in to ask her something and she, all excited, pulls him into the room to practice, which they manage to do quite well. At the end of the day, I hand over the cd with the song chosen and get them to practice to it. As I leave, I make sure they’ve gotten the steps and extract the promise to practice faithfully till the next class, which is the next day.




When we meet again the next day, they’ve somewhat forgotten the basics, but we get back on track pretty fast. This time we shift to Z’s bedroom almost immediately, since the connection to the ipod is there. Practice goes surprisingly well. Them being actors, they know how to bluff their way through an uncomfortable situation. So, when they mess up, they strike a flamboyant pose together and laugh. And it actually looks nice, even though it’s not a part of traditional Argentine tango.

So we’re more or less going along with the song now but the timing is still a little off. The thing is, in that any other dance, there are even spaced beats and a certain count, which you can follow, so you can pick up at the beginning of the bar at any time during the music. Tango, on the other hand, has music that flows and runs and dips and dances all over the place so it’s kinda difficult to follow. Plus the beat, i.e. the tempo keeps changing. The song I’ve chosen, even though it has a chorus type part, which is at one speed and the stanzas at another, making it pretty simple (comparatively) to follow. But without a proper understanding of music and musicality, you can’t really do much. All I can to is tell them to listen to the cd a couple more times and maybe the music will get into them. * Sigh *



At the end of this class, I walk out feeling a little confident that they will manage to fool the others and do a basic type performance with enough style that covers up their mistakes.




The next day, when I call to fix up the class, they aren’t able to make it. The day after that, I fall sick. The day after that, they’re not at home. The day after that, I get a call saying Xchacha is veryvery sick and therefore they will not be able to do the tango at all but they will definitely learn more when they come back from the trip.

* SIIIIGGGGHHH * Just when I thought it was going so well…





It was easier teaching these two, as compared to the other family/friend class I had. It might have something to do with teaching them as a couple. Its always easier when you have to teach a lady to respond to only her partners leads rather than get her used to dancing with a variety of people; it develops a kind of comfort level between the couple. The same is true vice versa. Also, when you have been ‘dancing’ together for 25 years (in a manner of speaking) then the other kind of dancing comes naturally.[]
However, I think it was easier, mainly because I’m not as close and as friendly with them as I am with the other biddies. Also they’re a little more professional, being actors. I hope we do continue the classes; it would be nice to see them dance together. It always gives me a little frisson of delight when I see students of mine dancing nicely. It must be the same feeling as watching your child learn to walk, eh? And when it’s someone you’re close to, (or you become friends with) the delight is even more.

I’ll keep y’all posted, there is another “Biddy” class that happened that I must chronicle. I will, very soon, I promise.

(Puts on fake, deep, TV announcers voice) “I hope you enjoyed this segment of our show, see you next time, same place, same webpage. Till then, it’s your favourite blogger, Natasha, and she’s bidding you a verrrry good night”
* Walks away, grinning widely and waving and nodding to the audience *